A friend at work has lunch with you every day, Monday through Friday. This female friend has been dating a guy for about a year. They seem to be very much in love. He has been pushing for her to move in with him. Finally, he has bought her an engagement ring, and they hope to get married in a year . . . or two . . . or three. He has a lot of old debts he wants to get paid off from a bad spot in life he is still trying to get over. She is still trying to pay off her student loans from college. He is using two arguments that she does not have an answer for:

1) We are in love and we are now engaged and we are planning to get married anyway. “Everybody” is living together nowadays anyway. We both know lots of people who live together first before they get married. Why not?

2) It makes sense financially. If we live together, we will be able to get married sooner. I can pay off my debts quicker, and you can pay off your student loans quicker, because we will be sharing expenses of housing and utilities.

He does not attend church anywhere, but he seems like an ok guy. He is friendly and pretty stable. She goes to a local church every Sunday on a regular basis and was brought up by very devout parents.

She asks you, “What do you think I should do?”

[If you are a male and married, don’t get distracted in answering this case study by the question of whether or not it is appropriate for you, as a married man, to be having lunch each day with a woman who is not married. Imagine that your lunch is in the company’s break room. Realize that this case study is written for a whole class of students, male and female, married and single.]

Study suggestions:

1. Study the topic of “cohabitation.” Get some statistics on this lifestyle, which is getting more and more popular in our society. 

2. Study the section on premarital sex in the instructor’s lesson for week 10.

3. Read an article written by the instructor in this module entitled “Moral Relativism.”

4. If you are inclined to write, “She should follow her heart,” please study these biblical passages: Genesis 6:5; 8:21; Jeremiah 17:9. Our consciences can mislead us. See Acts 23:1 where the apostle Paul is an example of this. Our consciences need proper training. See 1 Timothy 1:5.