|Years||Me||My mother||My grandmother|
|0-10||Joined grade 1 at age 6||-joined school at 7||-joined Christian missionary school at 7|
|11-20||-Baptized into Christianity at 15. -Finished high school at 16. -Got my first job at 17-Joined college College at 18||-Baptized to Christianity at 8-Finished high school at 18Father’s death at 11–Started acting and singing at 12 –||-Dropped out of school and 11Joined vocational training school at 13-Married at 16- First child at 16-Second child at 17-First death of child at 17 -Third child at 19|
|21-30||– Moving out of parent’s home at 21 -Get a masters degree at 25-Getting married at 27-First child at 28||-Moved out of parents house at 21-Got engaged at 22-First child at 23- Married at 25-Second child at 27||-Fourth child at 21-Widowed at 27|
|31-40||-Second child at 31 – Getting permanent job at 31||-won ALMA award at 32-First grandchild at||-First job at 33-Re-married at 33-Fifth child at 34-Sixth child at 36-First grandchild 38|
|41-50||First grandchild at 50||-Divorced at 47||-Second grandchild at 42-Third grandchild at 44|
|51-60||Second grandchild at 53||-Changed careers at 53-First travelling abroad at 54||-Crippled at 59|
|61-70||Retire at 66||-Married at 54||Retired at 62|
|71-80||Move to different state at 70||Widowed 79|
|81-90||Widowed at 82|
Me: The critical events in my life included finishing high school and getting my first job. The events shaped my life significantly as I began to make my own decisions and controlling my life. Joining college was also important to me as it marked the shaping of my career.
Mother: The most critical events in her life were her father’s death as it marked the beginning of poverty in the family which made her not join college despite applying and being accepted in several of them. Winning her first award in her thirties was also crucial as it shaped her career. Divorce from her first husband also affected her that she had to re-locate to a different state.
Grandmother: Getting married was the most critical part of her life. The death of her husband was also significant as she would be a widow in a community that cherished marriage. Her second marriage was also important as she hoped for support to raise the family in the then tough economy.
The main similarities occur at the age of joining school. Both my mother and I started grade 1 at an early age which was in tandem with society expectations (Caplan, 2018). My grandmother started school at the same age, too, although she did not undergo formal education. At the age of seven, society expects that a child is old enough to join school (Foster‐Hanson & Rhodes, 2019). The three of us were also baptized at around the same age since society expects children to be introduced to religion at a young age for proper upbringing.
The main difference in family matters. While I intend to get married at 27, my mother was engaged at 22 and gave birth before getting married officially. My grandmother was married at an early age of 16. The difference is as a result of a shift in priorities. Traditionally, family was so important to society that young people would marry much earlier, and those who delayed were considered outcasts (Esteve & Lesthaeghe, 2016). For the same reasons, my grandmother had to re-marry immediately. Today, people prioritize other things like education and career at the expense of family as witnessed by my marriage timing, which is dependent upon my education completion while my mother’s marriage depended on her career. The number of children in a family has also changed significantly and their distribution. Today, families have fewer children who are separated from each other by more than a year, unlike in the past, when families had many children with little interpregnancy time. Moreover, in terms of work, women were not expected to perform income-generating activities in the past. Instead, they stayed at home to perform domestic roles, and that is why my grandmother only got her first job after her husband’s death.
Caplan, B. (2018). The case against education: Why the education system is a waste of time and money. Princeton University Press.
Esteve, A., & Lesthaeghe, R. J. (Eds.). (2016). Cohabitation and marriage in the Americas: Geo-historical legacies and new trends. Springer.Foster‐Hanson, E., & Rhodes, M. (2019). Normative social role concepts in early childhood. Cognitive Science, 43(8), e12782.
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